The Time-Traveler's Daughter

My father has been dead 3 years today...and slowly but surely I am beginning to understand more about the man I've spent so much time being pissed at. 
Fred Henry "Hank" Williamson was a brilliant man...not much he couldn't do.  I'm a person of average intelligence who maxes it out.  It really pissed me off that he practically refused to do anything with all he had...He should have been the head of a Fortune 500 Company bare minimum...or so I always thought.  Instead he puttered about with Carpentry Projects & ran errands for my Mom & Grandmother.  He spent a lot of time just sitting at his kitchen table playing his guitar, reading, whittling, smoking his pipe and visiting with his various friends.  That's the way I like to remember my Dad...the life of the party, always doing something for his friends& family.  Constantly finding some new hobby to take on, some new infatuation...

Truth is, he  was ALWAYS at cross-purposes with someone...stayed a Hippy up until his death in that very Cheech & Chong sorta way...manipulated things to suit his own purposes and needs of the moment...and used alienation in a Brutal manner.  This is where the Anger came into the picture...

Although I did not realize it till I was a grown woman with kids of my own, my Dad was suffering from Mental Illness.  He spent a lot of time Severely Depressed and later in life suffered from Schizophrenia.   He was struggling to stay in the moment every day.  Much in the way that the Hero/Husband of "The Time Traveler's Wife" struggles to stay in the present, my Dad was struggling...and some days he succeeded and some days he failed and was Far out in the Universe...I could compare & contrast my Dad with that ill-fated Hero all day, but I will say this:  My Dad ALWAYS managed to keep his clothes on...and rarely popped up beaten & bloody...so it could have been worse...

So today I am reflecting back on the life that was my Dad's....and I don't feel quite so angry...after all, he put up a Hell of a Fight just to Stay in the Moment for his Family....It's hard to be Mad knowing that...so for now I'll just think of myself as "The Time Traveler's Daughter".

Baggage...Not the Pretty, Made for Vacation Type....

Today I had my relationship with my husband explained by someone who thinks they know us...perhaps they know us better than I know...perhaps not...that's not the issue.  

What they said: "Kelly just got lucky to find someone who had enough flaws that they had to put up with all her baggage..."

There can be no doubt that I brought baggage into our relationship...I am, after all HUMAN...and Humans have Baggage...and my husband brought flaws into our relationship...He too is HUMAN...

As I ponder this situation further, I've come to the conclusion that this is indeed what the basis for relationships is...FINDING PEOPLE IN THE UNIVERSE WHO CAN DEAL WITH YOUR BAGGAGE & FLAWS...and Dealing with their Baggage & Flaws in Return....

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY MY FRIENDS....I LOVE YOU...Baggage, Flaws & All...

Pretty Women

"God Help the Man who Marries a Pretty Woman!" 
These words actually came out of my husband's mouth.  He went on to explain that a man who marries a Pretty Woman can expect to always be waiting...that they require Lotions & Potions, and Sooooo Many Accessories...that they are constantly changing something about themselves or their surroundings...that life is ONE BIG ROLLERCOASTER with a Pretty Woman.
"Someday's You know, a Man can actually find himself wishing he'd married a Mennonite Woman..."   
I happen to know that my husband hates Borscht...He'd never make it married to a Mennonite woman...and he's never been a big fan of the Knee sock & pumps look...so I'm pretty sure there's a very slim chance he'd ever replace me with a woman who thinks Navy is a Wild Color...

HOWEVER, I am fixated on the idea that: He Thinks I'm Pretty!